Empty

Qu'est-ce que tu m'fais

Tu comprendras pas..
Barrière de langue.. Tu comprendras pas

Mais que me fais tu?
Mes valeurs...mes limites...
Plus rien n'a d'importance démesurée
Tu me poses et tu m'enflammes
J'veux juste être bien..sentir la caresse de la vie..souffler des étincelles de bonheur dans mon coeur.
Moi la passionnée..la tête folle... La dépressive..l'écorchée.. Je ressens une douceur que j'avais perdue

Je sens ton âme au travers mes tripes
J'veux savoir ce qu'il y a derrière ces sensations
Pourquoi cette rencontre..pourquoi nos chemins se sont croisés et décroisés

J'veux comprendre.

J'ai une sérénité fasse à la vie qui me déstabilise.

Qu'est-ce que tu me fais?
Pourquoi je veux tes baisers et tes mains sur moi...
Pourquoi tu occupes autant mes pensées...
Pourquoi je deviens chochotte..romantique..et que je rêve au prince charmant
Je laisse tomber mes gardes et je n'ai pas peur d'être blessée..et pourtant..ça fera mal
Ça na peut faire autrement..

Funny how we can miss something we never had

La vie, cette prison

Je sais bien qu'il a tout a perdre
Je sais aussi qu'il m'aime
Est-ce que l'amour est suffisant?
Je ne crois pas.
Je ne crois pas.

J'ai la tête troublée
Le coeur fêlé
Les cicatrices palpitent de douleur sans cesse
Je cherche mon air
Je cherche mon air

Pourquoi cette vie que tant recherche
Cette vie idolâtrée
Pourquoi pour moi, elle devient prison?
Pourquoi j'ai un étau, un corset qui comprime mes aspirations, mes rêves, ma folie?

Je suis triste.
Foncièrement triste
Vrai, j'ai des épisodes de bonheur..
Vrai, j'ai des joies
Vrai, la vie vaut la peine d'être vécue

J'ai mal à ma vie
Je veux vivre ma vie
Sans attache
Sans remords
Sans arrêt

?

I'm not sure what title to give..
I don't know exactly what tge topic will be.
I just feel a big hole in my soul.
I hate the feeling.
I feel sad.
My life is again slipping away.
I'm tired, haching.
I feel empty..alone.

I'm so sad.
I have no clue how to make it better.
I just want all to stop.

I'm tired of being strong.

Why am I upset...

Why
Because
Because it was special
Different
Because I didn't search for it..I didn't want it..it just happened
I didn't look fot it. You gave it to me
You offered your self
You were special
You are like a Tsunami in my head..and slowly doing the same fucking thig in my heart

I am upset because you are you..you are a normal guy...in a normal world..with normal needs and feelings..
This is stupid of me, but at the same time..feelings are feelings.
I need to figure out why or what..

Is it the fact that you were not the same..is it because you were high? Maybe. Still trying to wrap my thoughts around this part of you life.. I would have prefered you..doing the same proposition but  being your own self..
Maybe those are just my insecurities talking. Maybe you were just being a man..on valentine's day..wanting to fuck the girl he has been cruising for a few weeks..without any virtual sex or anything
Maybe this normal guy..who may be starting to fall is just also pissed about the situation...knowing that this girl is "banging" someone else.

Yeah..I am. I have a life and I can't just stop being the normal girlfriend.
I wish I could..stop just like that
All my friends know that I'm not happy..that this relashionship is not fullfiling my needs at all.

I am mad because I wasn't searching anyhting. I was doing my things and slowly getting the courage to change my situation..now you changed all that.. You and your words..you awakened feelings and needs I furiously was trying to burry.

I am not supposed to be mad because of silly pictures..or by the fact that you relax yourself a different way than me. It's not my business..
We don't know each other
Man, we don't even know what we smell like..I sure don't want to see a fucking dick before I even know if I like kissing you..but I do understand the needs.

Fuck, this is hard in all possible ways.
Not touching.. Not seeing you. Not looking in your eyes..
Talking about stuff that we should feel instead of living them...

You do talk to me..but I'm sure you have issues with stuff that you don't talk about..probably fearing my reaction.

What made me mad is that I wasn't expecting you to be a normal guy in the middle of the day..what made me mad is that I don't know you enough.
What made me mad is that Im insecured about the use and I dont know if you did use..
What made me mad is that I really have no rights to be mad...

I am mad because I allowed it to touched me.